Listen now (43 mins) | “I think what one of the things that's interesting to me is like when we think about what causes distress and a life that goes awry, there's so much attention to different..."

Listen now (60 min) | “I’ve won arm wrestles with big muscular men, right out of prison because you align the energy. Everything wants to harmonize with it..."

Listen now (46 mins) | "And some people might not even not be able to realize that. They might not even realize that, that they've even have these patterns or behaviors..."

Listen now (55 mins) | "This is the richness of the trad wife explosion, right? There's this simple idea that you get to choose. Now you're choosing to emulate a situation that's a fiction in..."

Listen now (51 mins) | “The focus of adulthood has been on stability, just, you know, find a job and don't leave it, find a partner and don't get divorced..."

Listen now (52 mins) | “This waiting for approval from daddy—all of that is so antithetical to actually living your own existence..."

Listen now (51 mins) | "What optogenetics does is it's an engine of discovery. It helps us identify what matters, what's causing things to happen in the brain. And we know now the cells..."

Listen now (50 mins) | “I think it's good to relive the past and then revise your life...go through it, but don't get stuck in it.”

Listen now (53 min) | “But the true guru, you know, the Buddha came and turned all that inside out. You know the Buddha taught the Four Noble Truths..."

Listen now (52 min) | “Sometimes you can't see the full path. And so you don't even venture into the unknown, you know, you're unhappy..."

Listen now (55 mins) | "What I became aware of when I started writing about resistance and I thought the healthy body resists infection. We have an immune system and the healthy psyche resists..."

Listen now (61 mins) | “Now the tragedy, in one sense is a tragedy, that often people only become open when they've suffered horribly when that is both the tragedy of trauma, but also the promise."

Listen now (50 min) | “I think what COVID did was it really made people realize that the state of their emotions, the state of their relationships, all of those things..."

Listen now (56 min) | “I’ve never really figured out how come we stop asking each other questions. You know, we always do that in the beginning of a relationship..."

Listen now (61 mins) | “Every single human being is a pack animal. That's what we are biologically. We would die if we didn't depend on each other. Saying what you need is a form of connecting..."

Listen now (56 mins) | "We need to understand how your mind works and how their mind works and how even they might be the same mind."

Listen now (67 mins) | “And I think a lot of us embody this, what I call the paradox of the courageous coward, right? Like, we're capable of doing these things that are bonkers..."

Listen now (51 mins) | “I think we need each other. I say this all the time, there are some things that are too big to feel in one body. You need a collective body to move them through. And I..."

Listen now (52 mins) | “When I can pause for a moment, the next action becomes really easy. And that’s all I really need is the next action that’s going to start getting me back into the flow..."

Listen now (54 mins) | “The whole sense though, of the Upper Limit Problem, is instead of feeling good and then feeling bad, which is how we think it's supposed to work. You know, you feel bad..."

Listen now (59 mins) | "That’s true for all of, I think, the fawn response, which is it keeps people at a distance. If we’re only showing people the most perfect curated version of ourselves..."

Listen now (44 min) | “That's what I think is so funny about this is like a hundred years on these things that he's talking about remain as live as ever..."

Listen now (45 mins) | “You want to find yourself? Give. We're not hungry for what we're not getting. We're hungry for what we're not giving. And then at the same time, you watch this old pattern..."

Listen now (50 mins) | “But it's also okay not to get it right. You know, people mistakenly think that they want perfection, say you're playing golf and you wish you could get a hole..."

Listen now (41 mins) | "We can't change what's happened, but we can change what it looks like inside of our mind-brain-body network."

Listen now (58 min) | “I think it's very important to mention also, Elise, that even if a woman feels permission to be angry, that anger..."

Listen now (56 mins) | So I think the research overwhelmingly shows that people who are secure, the benefits are really far and wide, not just in relationships, also for us ourselves, for how..."

Listen now (46 mins) | “There are therapies where the person is made to relive their traumas over and over and over again. It's called flooding. And that's the one type..."

Listen now (53 mins) | “There are studies showing that, once your basic needs are met, and you're not worried about losing your house, losing your health care, increases in money don't..."

Listen now (66 min) | “Where in your life where you're not saying yes, but there's a, yes. That wants to be said where there's some desire for self-expression..."

Listen now (46 mins) | "We might see wintering as this defined phase where we are struggling, but I wanted to talk about being in contact with our emotions on an everyday basis..."

Listen now (47 mins) | “Here's what I would say: peace will happen when people invest in cultivating peace as opposed to war. Peace will happen. And one thing I know, for me, I know peace, I know..."

Listen now (62 mins) | “ We know in clinical science, there is nothing that is a quarter as protective against suffering as spirituality."

Listen now (62 mins) | “It's important to realize that yes, menopause can come with symptoms, but the symptoms are not alien symptoms. We've seen them..."

Listen now (46 mins) | “The real meaning of ‘remember’ is to put the members back together, to make whole. So a lot of times we go back in time to a special time or a special moment and nostalgia..."

Listen now (59 mins) | You cannot differentiate when you never fight. Fighting is also a tool for differentiation, for having two people be able to breed and grow inside a relationship..."

Listen now (54 mins) | “Part of middle life is that hopefully there's a little bit of wisdom there. And I think that is part of what we gain as we go through this journey of life is that there..."

Listen now (53 min) | “I talk about dysfunctional relational stances that would repeat over and over again. For example, angry pursuit is an oxymoron. Angry pursuit..."

Listen now (55 min) | “Before our boys have learned to read, they have already read the stoic code of masculinity and are conforming to it..."

Listen now (61 mins) | "Know this is happening and if you can come into alignment with this is the way the human being functions, you can do the work to lower the reservoir..."

Listen now (58 mins) | “I’m trying to map the territory in the center world, just the way I did with families and the distinction that immediately leaped out was between parts..."

Listen now (62 min) | “How do we actually with due speed, because this is a timely issue, start to live in modern culture, which has taken over the planet basically live in a way that is really..."

Listen now (43 mins) | “If there is this part of you that you think is inferior, the weak spot, something you're ashamed of, etc., it's one of these things where if you believe it's true, there's..."

Listen now (45 mins) | "The human being is the most giving, self-sacrificing, loving entity and also is the most devious, amoral, vicious, and murderous is the better word..."

Listen now (59 mins) | “I think it's really important for, you know, people to realize that you can totally be an absolutely excellent parent of a traumatized child and the trauma had nothing..."

Listen now (53 mins) | “If we’re not open to discrepant, unwanted information that happens to be correct, we become unable to change our direction and change our minds.”

Listen now (51 min) | “I think the biggest challenge with codependency is when a family member is catered to when their unhealthy or toxic behavior is catered to..."

Listen now (51 min) | “As a therapist, I started to discover that when people need boundaries, they start to have issues around anxiety in their relationships..."

Listen now (65 mins) | “Boundaries don't tell other people what to do. They tell other people what you are willing to do to take responsibility..."

Listen now (50 min) | “I think we're due for a cultural rebranding around crying. I think that crying, you know, if we start to cry, we invariably apologize..."

Listen now (55 mins) | "That is also other than asking for help, it is mattering to myself that has become a profound practice in my life, and bizarrely, countercultural and bizarre..."

Listen now (57 mins) | "You can't be independent if you're not deeply connected. So what happens to a child that's not deeply connected? What actually happens? Guess what happens? They don't feel..."

Listen now (77 mins) | “All growing up stages are the product of scientific investigation of the stages of growing up that people go through. And those are all defined in third person terms..."

Listen now (59 mins) | "Nobody wants to be somebody with a serious substance use problem. Nobody wants to be addicted to a substance. I mean, it doesn't feel good. Dependency doesn't feel good."

Listen now (64 mins) | "Well, the first thing that's going on is we're creating new neural pathways in our brain of a new experience and really a new way our brain is performing."

Listen now (54 mins) | “If you have a reaction to a stranger or someone in the media or someone in politics or someone who's just providing this kind of blank slate because you don't really..."

Listen now (54 mins) | “There's no generation before us that’s had this opportunity to find this treasure..."

This is obviously an incredibly wide and nebulous category (I also have shelves devoted to addiction, trauma, relationships, death and dying, spirituality, etc.